Any type of relationship loss can change how you see the world and your life. Sometimes it happens for good, the other times its a good lesson for future. In such a situation it’s important to remember “you are not alone“,”this too shall pass” and “you are stronger than you think“. Its a good time to explore your strengths, take inspiration from others and develop new coping skills. When it comes to coping up after a relationship is over, what works for one person may not work for the other. You will need to experiment with different approaches until you find the key to filling the emptiness.
One of the most important thing to remember is replace rumination ( which will happen, but we decide to deal with it in a healthy way ) with positive affirmations. Don’t neglect bright areas of your life with negative events happening all over the place. Instead make them your strength.
Pay attention on what lifts you up and makes you feel better. For example your old thought patterns can make you feel bad about almost everything, so stop thinking that way! Find the thoughts that work for you. And what works for you depends on why you feel lost to begin with. Identify the specific reason you feel so lost.
What type of relationship did you lose? And, what feelings are you struggling with? One of the first ways to stop feeling so lost is to identify what you’re afraid of, and why you miss this person so much. Take time to write down your answers to these questions. You may find comfort and healing in simply becoming more aware of the reasons you feel so lost. Then share your thoughts, feelings and question with someone trustworthy and non-judgmental.
By sharing your own story and listening to someone else can be soothing and inspiring. Ask others how they emotionally detached from someone they really cared about. Try those ideas in your own life. It’s possible that what worked for others may not work for you. But its always interesting to see others perspective.
Writing about your relationship and how you want your future to unfold is a great way to deal with loss in life.
Feelings of abandonment after someone breaks up with you are deep. Being left by someone you love triggers past memories of rejection and loss. Which can trigger anxiety and depression.
We all need love and relationships for a fulfilling life. When we’re rejected, we’re cut to the core. A breakup is an incredibly painful experience, and it needs to be grieved like any loss of a relationship. So, when you feel sorry for yourself after being left by a man — even if you agree that the relationship is over — go easy on yourself. Give yourself the kindness and gentleness you’d expect from a nurturing mom or loving best friend. Pamper yourself all good things you can. Slowly you’ll start feeling good and enjoy things once again, if not immediately. But never miss a chance to do something good for yourself even if it feels like you’ll never get happy again.
Its good to look back at things but in a healthy way. Think back to when you and your partner first started dating. Or to when you and your husband said your wedding vows! What was the biggest surprise about your breakup? How did it go against all your expectations? Thinking about this can help you stop feeling sorry for yourself. See how you thought things would go and how they went. Why did that happen. Admit your mistakes and partners clearly & correctly. Give those facts an outsider view. You’ll be amazed by seeing that past relationship in new light.
See to it if you were/are ignoring the truth. Sometimes we know something is true a relationship isn’t working out, a partner isn’t being honest or abusive, a marriage is dull and lifeless but we refuse to admit it. We don’t want to face the truth, because the truth hurts. And when we’re forced to face the truth, we feel sorry for ourselves. We’re consumed with self-pity and even self-loathing.
What were you ignoring about your relationship? Was the breakup a true surprise, or did you see it coming? How can this help you stop feeling sorry for yourself, now that he’s/she’s gone?
Try to be on best of your mental and physical health. That will help you a lot in every good and bad situations in life. If you try everyday to be best version of your self, you are already on route to be someone you want to be. Not what people want you to be. Its wise to have a strong, bright and happy track in life of things you love to do. That will provide you strength and give you a reason to smile & start once again. When life will go onto its roller-coaster ride you’ll have something to hold onto and be happy about.
Always keep learning how world works, how life happens. Keep your expectations real, some people feel only they are facing so many problems and rest of the world is enjoying. That’s never the case, we all enjoy life as well as face problems at different times of our lives. Other people are also dealing with health problems, legal problems, relationship breakdowns, separations, divorces, family estrangements, betrayals — even if they look normal, happy, and healthy on the outside.
Take responsibility of yourself in every situation of life, never ever agree to be a victim. Arm yourself with wisdom and acceptance. Think : I’m a knowledgeable and powerful being, i will face anything life has to offer.
Post your thoughts and experiences on similar situations, it may help some one or you get to see a different perspective on your experience. After all we’re all here to share.